Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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The Black Knight

Category: Gaggle of Groaners listserv, Rated G, Shaggy Dogs

This classic old-timer was posted by Stan Kegel on the groaners listserv.


Once upon a time there was a famous black knight on a black horse who desired the hand of a fair princess. So, he rode to the castle where the princess lived to seek permission from her father, the king.

“Who goes there?” demanded the castle gatekeeper.

“It is the black knight on the black horse,” replied the knight. “I wish to see the king.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?” replied the gatekeeper.

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse.”

“Very well. You may come through.” The knight entered the royal chamber.

“Who is it?” boomed the king.

“It is the black knight on the black horse. I have come to ask for the hand of your daughter, the Princess Romana.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?” said the king.

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse.”

“Well,” said the king, “before you can marry my daughter, you must obtain a golden ring from the golden dragon.”

“I shall do that,” replied the knight, and he rode off to find the golden dragon.

The golden dragon was in its lair. “Who goes there?” it called at the sound of approaching hoofs.

“It is the black knight on the black horse. I have come to claim the golden ring with which 1 may marry the king’s daughter, the Princess Romana.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?” said the golden dragon.

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse.”

The golden dragon handed him the golden ring and he rode back to the castle.

“Who goes there?” demanded the gatekeeper.

“It is the black knight on the black horse.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse. I am here to see the king-”

“Very well. Come through.” The black knight entered the royal chamber.

“Who is it?” boomed the king.

“It is the black knight on the black horse.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse. I have obtained the golden ring from the golden dragon. Now I may ask for the hand of your daughter, the Princess Romana?”

“Before you can marry my daughter,” replied the king, “you must also obtain the emerald ring from the green dragon.”

“I shall do that,” said the knight and he rode off in search of the green dragon.

The green dragon was in its lair. “Who goes there?” it said, hearing the sound of approaching hoofs.

“It is the black knight on the black horse. I have come to claim the emerald ring with which I may marry the king’s daughter, the Princess Romana.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse.”

The green dragon handed the emerald ring to the black knight and he rode back to the castle.

“Who goes there?” demanded the gatekeeper.

“It is the black knight on the black horse. I am here to see the king.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse.”

“Very well. Come through.” The knight entered the royal chamber.

“Who is it?” boomed the king.

“It is the black knight on the black horse.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse. I have obtained the emerald ring from the green dragon and now I have come to ask for the hand of your daughter, the Princess Romana.”

“Before you can marry my daughter,” replied the king, “you must also obtain the ruby ring from the red dragon.”

“Then I shall do that,” said the knight and he rode off in search of the red dragon. The dragon was in its lair.

“Who goes there?” called the dragon, hearing the sound of approaching hoofs.

“It is the black knight on the black horse.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse. I have come to claim the ruby ring so that I may marry the king’s daughter, the Princess Romana.”

The red dragon handed the black knight the ruby ring and the knight rode back to the castle.

“Who goes there?” demanded the gatekeeper.

“It is the black knight on the black horse.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse. I am here to see the king.”

“Very well. Come through.” The knight entered the royal chamber.

“Who is it?” boomed the king.

“It is the black knight on the black horse.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse. I have obtained the ruby ring from the red dragon and now I wish to ask for the hand of your daughter, the Princess Romana.”

“Very well,” said the king, “you have obtained all three rings. You may ask for the hand of my daughter, the Princess Romana.” The knight was escorted to the princess’s chamber.

“Who is it?” asked the princess.

“It is the black knight on the black horse.”

“Not the black knight on the black horse?”

“Yes, the black knight on the black horse. Your father, the king, has given me permission to ask for your hand in marriage. So, fair princess, will you marry me?”

“No way.”

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