Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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The Bad Tattoo

Category: Adult Theme, Shaggy Puppy

I have known this story for over ten years. I have been waiting for a version to come along, but none has. Thus, this my re- creation.

A young lady who was much in love with Elvis and his memory finally decided she just had to acquire a tattoo of the singer on an intimate part of her anatomy, the inner thigh to be exact. She went to a local tattoo parlor to check it out.

“Can you do a tattoo of Elvis?” she asked.

“Oh, yes. An exact likeness.”

“Can you put it on my inner thigh?”

“That’s a little unusual, but certainly I can.”

She went ahead with the procedure. When it was done, she looked at it and with great disappointment and cried out, “That’s not Elvis!”

“Why, yes. It’s an exact likeness of Elvis.

“No, no, it’s not, and I am not going to pay you.”

After some half-hour of wrangling, the tattoo artist agreed to do another tattoo of Elvis on the other inner thigh. When he was done, he invited his client to look at his perfect rendition of the King.

She took one look and said, “That’s not Elvis!”

“Yes, yes. It’s an exact likeness of Elvis.

“No, no, it’s not, and I am not going to pay you for this one, either.”

Again, there was a long argument. Finally, they agreed to go along with the judgment of an independent observer. They randomly selected a man walking down the street and invited him into the tattoo parlor. “Who does this look like?” he was asked.

After studying the situation for a long time, he said, “I don’t know who the guys on either side are, but the one in the middle looks like Willie Nelson.”

Lowrie Beacham responded:

Reminds me of an ancient one, as well. Back in the days when cable TV was first getting raunchy, an elderly couple was lamenting the decline. The husband said, “I tell you, Mabel, any day now, they’ll be showing “it” on television!”

Not long after, he called her from the kitchen, excitedly, saying, “I knew it! Look, Mabel, there it is, right there on the screen!”

His wife bustled in, took a good look, and said, “Fred, calm down. That’s just Fidel Castro eating a banana.”

It appears there is no end to this one. Gus Morfis updates us:

It had to happen and the world has caught up with the Feghoots of the world. Specifically, I just heard the current one about the girl with the two bad Elvises [should that be, Elvii?].

The tale reads the same, except that instead of Willie Nelson as the punch line, the punch line is now Osama Bin Ladan……………Actually its a better fit, I think.

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