All posts tagged Best Stressed Puns

Every year, members of the International Save the Pun Foundation vote on the ten best stressed puns posed within Pundit the previous year. Most of these were added to the site for historical purposes long after they were released.

Note: It’s not always ten puns. Sometimes it’s more.

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 2008

Puns voted by the members of the International Save the Pun Foundation to be the ten best stressed puns posted in the Pundit’s pages in 2008.

Two birds are sitting on a perch. One says to the other, “Do you smell fish?”

Clark, Lois, and Jimmy were striding down the streets of Metropolis one sunny afternoon. As they passed a construction site, Lois noticed a worker carrying a load of bricks up the ladder on his shoulder. She stopped dead, … Read the rest...

The Best Stressed Puns of 2005

FOR IMMEDIATE RELIEF TO THE NEWS TELLERS OF THE WORLD.

On this day, January 1, 2006, as on every New Year’s Day since 1982, the International Save the Pun Foundation brings you the results of the voting of its members on their choices of the best puns of the year. (2005)

There are three kinds of people, those that can count and those that can’t. Bearing this rule in mind we role out the International Save the Pun Foundation’s … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 2004

FOR IMMEDIATE RELIEF TO THE

NEWS TELLERS OF THE WORLD.

On this day, January 1, 2005, as on every New Year’s Day

since 1982, The International Save the Pun Foundation

brings you the results of the voting of its members on the

choices of the best puns of the year. (2004)

There are three kinds of people, those that can count and

those that can’t.

Bearing this rule in mind we role out the International Save

the Pun list … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 2003

JANUARY 1 2004

Each year the International Save the Pun Foundation publishes the puns that have been voted on by its membership as the Ten Best Stressed Puns.

In the Pundit, the official newsletter of the ‘ISTPF’, which is issued monthly, there appear the puns that the members of the organization submit for entry into the world of word play. It is from these submissions that the Ten Best are chosen and sent around the world in this annual news … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 2002

THE INTERNATIONAL SAVE THE PUN FOUNDATION brings you, FOR A MEDIA RELIEF (As in press and release) the

The Ten Best?Stressed Puns of 2002 which have just been announced by Norman Gilbert, the Chairman of the Bored of this the world’s largest apocryphal society. So many entries were nominated this, the twentieth year of selection, that they had to be stored in two bins; The “MIGHT HAVE BIN” and the “HAS BIN.”

We saw the Eiffel Tower flying from Paris … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 2001

The International Save the Pun Foundation Press and release

To be communicated on January I’t 2002. For more information email us atpunpunpun @ rogers.com or visit us at www.punpunpun.com on the Internet.

We continue our work to overcome ill literacy. We are delighted by the growing worldwide support for the efforts made by the members of The International Save the Pun Foundation, the world’s largest and fastest growing apocryphal society, to increase the interest in reading by spreading the … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 2000

The International Save the Pun Foundation Communique

To be released on January 1st 2001. For more information email us atngilbert@punpunpun.com or visit us at http://www.punpunpun.com/ on the Internet.

As we continue our work to overcome ill literacy, we are delighted by the growing worldwide support for the efforts of the International Save the Pun Foundation, the world’s largest and fastest growing apocryphal society,

to increase the interest in reading by spreading the pleasure of wordplay through its … Read the rest...

The Best Stressed Puns of the Millennium

The International Save the Pun Foundation has voted as

The Best Stressed Puns of the Millennium.

Sharpen your pun cells, O pun pals. Let’s get to wit:

“PUNS ARE THEIR OWN REWORDS!”

JJJ

How can I use a lighthouse, a rose trellis a windstorm and a dune  in a tasteful punecdote? The answer: “HOW ABOUT A BEACON LATTICE AND TORNADO SAND RIDGE?”

JJJ

A herring who for many years swam along with a friendly whale showed up one day without … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1998

It is the eighteenth time that we announce the 10 Best Stressed Puns of the year.

Norman Gilbert, Chairman of the Bored II tells us that these puns have received the most votes by the members of the Foundation, the pun devotees (should that be devotors?) and will therefore take their place in the annals of pun history.

Is the George Washington Bridge a car-mangled spanner?

***

Orson Wells portrayed a spy, in the motion picture The Third Man. During … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1997

The International Save the Pun Foundation

January 1, 1998

The nominations for the Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1997 have poured into

the post office box of the ISTPF. They have been tabulated and

counted. Much time has been spent in putting together this most

anticipated list. It is with great excitement that the Chairman of the

Bored Too, Norman Gilbert, announced, for the groaning pleasure of

the members of this, the oldest apocryphal society, the ten puns that

were … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1994

Puns voted by the members of the International Save the Pun Foundation to be the ten best stressed puns posted in the Pundit’s pages in 1994.


Maurie Cook of the TV show Sugar and Spice signs off this way: “Well, it looks like my thyme’s up. I’d like to thank Basil my producer, Rosemary my technical adviser and Ginger my director. Tune in turmeric for another kitchen caper. Dill we meet again, have a spice day.”


Attorney Balderson and Wanda … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1993

Puns voted by the members of the International Save the Pun Foundation to be the ten best stressed puns posted in the Pundit’s pages in 1993.


All but lost in the holiday was the story of a Chicago art dealer who was transporting some valuable paintings to customers when his truck shot off the Michigan Avenue bridge and fell into the Chicago river.

Questioned later by the police, the dealer observed philosophically, “I hated Toulouse-Lautrec, but that’s the way the … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1992

Puns voted by the members of the International Save the Pun Foundation to be the ten best stressed puns posted in the Pundit’s pages in 1992.


A report from archaeologists digging in the Middle East suggests that automotive technology originated not in modern America but in what the scientists believe to have been the first delicatessen.

Sifting through the ancient ruin, the team has discovered that workers there had been told they could eat anything they wanted during their lunch … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1991

Puns voted by the members of the International Save the Pun Foundation to be the ten best stressed puns posted in the Pundit’s pages in 1991.


A scarcely reported incident of the Desert Storm conflict grew out of the U.S. military’s orders that chaplains assigned to the field would have to wear vestments bearing a desert camouflage pattern.

Fortunately, the chaplains found a liturgical supply house that not only carried the required garments but also, anticipating a quick victory for … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1990

Although there is ample room for doubt, a student of motion picture history says he had traced the orgin of a famous Warner Bros. movie cry to Disneyland. Seems that when the park first opened, Walt Disney had an apartment over its firestation with windows that opened above the dock where the park’s supplies were delivered. Every morning, the story goes, the crew on the dock had to wait until Disney awakened before they could start work. So as soon … Read the rest...

The Ten Best Stressed Puns of 1986

Puns voted by the members of the International Save the Pun Foundation to be the ten best stressed puns posted in the Pundit’s pages in 1986.


A family of high-class potatoes was able to send their daughter to college. A few months later, however, she came home and announced that she was quitting college to get married. Very upset, the parents demanded to know who the man was.

When the girl told them she was in love with a famous … Read the rest...