Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Music Scam

Category: Rated G

This is from Beverly Williams.


Dr. Vincent Beraid, an expert in designer genes, specialized in creating large animals for meat production. His death occurred during the development of a hog weighing over one ton. To take care of this huge animal, Dr. Beraid used almost eighty gorilla clones trained to carry out the mundane daily tasks.

The hog had terrible bad breath. It was necessary, after feeding the beast, to force over 100 Chlorets down his throat before anyone could go into the lab.

On the day of the doctor’s death, one of the gorillas had spilled the breath freshener tablets onto the ground. The doctor became enraged and began beating the poor ape, but his brothers rioted. The police report detailed the event:

“Seventy-six strong clones fed the pig Beraid, with a hundred and ten Chlorets close at hand.”

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