Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Birds

Category: Gaggle of Groaners listserv, Rated G

This was posted on the groaners listserv.


A Mexican named Juan decided that he might be able to supplement his income by investing in, breeding, and selling tropical birds. He began by buying a large red-billed toucan and started to raise it in an attempt to discover if he had a flair for handling birds. He soon discovered that the care and feeding of his rare tropical toucan was costing much more than he had originally anticipated.

Juan tried to save money by sacrificing his own dietary well being and began living on basic staples like rice and beans. Unfortunately, the bird was still very expensive to feed and care for. Juan experimented. He began feeding his bird the same food he ate.

He was surprised to discover that the bird flourished. The toucan did wonderfully well eating the same inexpensive food as Juan. The bird particularly liked rice and beans.

Juan became famous in the annals of bird breeding when it was discovered that toucan live as cheaply as Juan.

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