Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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Vick’s VapoRub

Category: Gaggle of Groaners listserv, Rated G

This was posted on the groaners listserv. The author is not known.


A man had a furniture store specializing in ornate baroque style antiques. He had a terrible cold, but was at his store working anyway.

He was sitting in one of the baroque style chairs rubbing Vicks VapoRub on his aching chest when he, quite by accident, got some on the chair. This proved serendipitous, as he discovered that the soothing ointment gave the furniture a wonderful, deep, rich shine.

He immediately told several other furniture store owner friends.

Soon after, he got reports that the Vicks treatment had not only failed to work on their more modern furniture, but it even ruined some of them! Needless to say, he is not very unpopular with those friends now.

He did learn an important lesson, however … if it’s not baroque, don’t Vicks it.

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