Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Thirty New Yorkers at the Pearly Gates

Category: Rated G, Shaggy Puppy

Bob Dvorak told us this tale during the meal following the 2004 PunOff. He says it is old, but being the innocent that I am, I had never heard it before.


It seems that St. Peter came running to the Higher Authorities one day. “What’s the problem?” he was asked.

“Whatever will we do?” he asked. “There are thirty New Yorkers at the Pearly Gates, asking for permission to come it. This has never happened before. What should we do?”

“Go back, select the five best among them, and let them in. We will look into it before we decide exactly what to do with the rest of them.”

St. Peter left, but it was only a few minutes before he came running back. “They’re gone, they’re gone!”

“What, the New Yorkers?”

“No, the Pearly Gates.”

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