Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


The Wise Bride

Category: Adult Theme, Shaggy Puppy

Another one told me by Mel Lett. Way back when.


The young bride approached her awaiting husband on their wedding night and demanded $20 for their first love making encounter. In his highly aroused state, he readily agreed. This scenario was repeated each time they made love for the next 30 years, him thinking it was a cute way for her to buy new clothes, and such.

Arriving home around noon one day, she found her husband in a very drunken state. Over the next few minutes she heard of the ravages of financial ruin caused by corporate down sizing and it’s effects on a 50-year old executive.

Calmly, she handed him a bank book showing deposits and interest for 30 years totaling nearly $1 million dollars. Pointing across the parking lot, she gestured toward the local bank while handing him stock certificates worth nearly $2 million dollars and informing him that he was the largest stockholder in the bank. She told him that for 30 years she had charged him each time they had sex, and this was the result of her investments.

By now he was distraught and beating his head against the side of the car. She asked him why the disappointment at such good news and he replied, “If I had known what you were doing, I would have given you all of my business!”

Some men just don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.

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  1. Chuck

     /  October 15, 2010

    I would have given you ALL of my business.

  2. Alan B. Combs

     /  October 18, 2010

    Thank you for the catch.

    Alan

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