Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive

The Princess

Category: Gaggle of Groaners listserv, Rated G

This was posted to the groaners listserve by Gail S. Angel.

Once upon a time, there lived a beautiful young fairy princess who dreamed of being a ballet dancer. Then one day, she read an ad in her email that announced the Royal Ballet’s next auditions in a nearby town.

So on the right day, the fairy princess geared up one hundred white pigeons to her chariot, and off they flew to the theater.

After witnessing her outrageous entrance, the director immediately told her to go back home.

“But why?” wept the broken-hearted shell of the would-be-ballerina.

“Because,” came the heartless reply, “I’ve got enough pigeon-towed dancers in the company already.”

Chris Cole responded:

Years (eons?) ago a college punster friend of mine sang a little ditty, sung to an often-heard Italian song, that went something like this…

On my feet I have but ten toes,
They’re not lady toes, but men toes,
And I keep them as mementos,
For I love them tenderly.

Keep a song in your heart! (….but…. maybe a different one?!?!!!)

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