Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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The Origin of Animals

Category: Cat Tails, Rated PG, Shaggy Dogs

From Tom Vickery comes this venerable old tale (are there any other types?)


A newly discovered chapter in the book of Genesis has provided the answer to the question, “Where did pets come from?” According to the newly discovered scriptures, Adam and Eve said, “Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we don’t see you any more and we’re lonesome here and it’s difficult for us to remember how much you love us.”

And God said; “No problem! I will create a companion that will be with you forever and will be a reflection of my love. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you and love you as I do.”

And God created this animal and it was good…and He was pleased.

Adam said, “Lord, what do we call this animal?”

God replied, “Since it is a reflection of me, let’s reverse my name and call it Dog.”

And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them, and loved them always, and wagged it’s tail.

After a while an angel came to God and said, “Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks, and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has taught them too well that they are loved.”

And God said, “No problem! I’ll create another companion who will see them as they really are, one that will remind them of their limitations, so they’ll know they are not always worthy of adoration.”

And God created Cat.

And Cat would not obey them. And when Eve gazed into Cat’s eyes, she was reminded that they were not supreme beings. And Adam and Eve learned humility…and they were greatly improved.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was happy.

And Cat didn’t really give a shit one way or the other!

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