Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


The Math Exam

Category: Rated G

This was sent to us by HWILTC. He says, “I thought of this Feghoot yesterday when I saw a car with a [related] vanity plate. It’s original to me, but I’m old enough to have read the Fegoot stories when they were new. I may have let someone else’s joke fester in the slimy grey cells of my mind long enough that I’ve forgotten when I first heard it.”


The high school math student looked at the final exam in front of him. He knew that he had to pass the test to be qualified to play in the State Football Championships. He did well until he came to the last question — ‘Describe a method for determining the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter’. The student realized the answer was beyond his skills and he left the classroom knowing that he had not passed and that his chances of a State Championship, a college scholarship, and an NFL career were gone. Frustrated, he went to his car, found a pistol and fired a round through the window of the math teacher’s office. No one was hurt.

When the police arrived they asked the math teacher if she had any idea what might have prompted the attack. “Yes”, she said, “I believe it was a derive pi shooting.”


Chris Cole added:

I suppose one could say that the aspiring (or, overly-perspiring?) gridiron star finally went ballistic when he reached critical math.

Then again, it might not be a true story, but simply a work of fission.

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