Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


The Human Stain

Category: Gaggle of Groaners listserv, Puns, Rated G

A recent offering from Stan Kegel and Richard Lederer’s book.


Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers were having dinner at an expensive New York restaurant. It was the place to be seen and both had dressed for the occasion. Ginger was resplendent in a ball gown and diamond tiara while Fred wore his smartest morning suit. But the evening was marred when the waiter bringing their desserts tripped and covered Fred from head to toe in treacle sponge.

“I’m terribly sorry,” said the red-faced waiter.

“You should be,” grumped Fred. “Thanks to you I’ve pudding on my top hat, pudding on my white tie, pudding on my tails!”


“The Human Stain” from “The Ants Are My Friends” by Richard Lederer & Stan Kegel (©2007 Marion Street Press).  “I’m putting on my top hat, tying on my white tie, brushing off my tails” from “My Top Hat” by Irving Berlin, from the movie “Top Hat” (©1935 RKO)

« Previous post

Leave a Reply