Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


The Graduate Student

Category: Rated G

This is another variant of this common horsey pun.


There was this kindly professor who took on an errant graduate student. This student had difficulty making anything work. She was late, she broke things. She wasted reagents and never cleaned up after herself. However, she was always pleasant, and she treated the professor and his profession with utmost respect. This was uplifting and very pleasant for him.

So, when the inevitable time came for him to drop her he felt very sad. Therefore, he went to a great deal of trouble to make it as easy on her as possible. He took her to a nice restaurant and hired a musician to play Mozart while they dined. Later, when his colleagues would ask him why he went to so much trouble for such a pain in the kazoo, he replied, “But this is divorce of a reverent scholar.”

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