Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


The Blue Volvo

Category: Rated G

Jim owned a blue-green colored Volvo. It was a ’72 however, making it quite old and even Volvos don’t last forever. When he was driving home one afternoon and the engine fell through the engine mounts, his wife brought up the subject of buying a new car. “Well, I’ve grown partial to this car, dear” said Jim. “But honey, this car is falling apart!” his wife exclaimed. The argument went on for a while and the husband finally agreed that he would buy a new car, but only another Volvo and only the same blue-green color. It had to be the *exact* same shade of blue or he wasn’t interested. And so his quest began. “Nope. Are you sure they’re made in that color?” asked all the Volvo dealers in New York. He went to Connecticut and received the same line. He went to Rhode Isalnd, only to hear “Nope – had one last week. Couldn’t sell it so we gave it to a junk dealer.” Jim ran to the junk dealer just in time to see the car of his dreams crushed.

He travelled through Vermont. “Nope. Can’t get one here.” He tried New Hampshire. “I don’t think they make them.” He went into Maine. “I don’t have one, but Charlie might. He’s the Volvo dealer up in Caribou.”

Anyone ever told you about Caribou, Maine? It is freezing up there and is in the middle of nowhere. Unfortunately, at this point, an enormous storm system began to move into the area and Jim was trapped at the dealership during the blizzard. Two days later, when the dealer arrived to open up shop, he found Jim standing by the door. Then the dealer opened the door, Jim saw it. Right in the middle of the showroom floor was his blue-ish colored Volvo. Perfect!

Jim told the dealer of his quest, paid him the sticker price and was about to leave when the dealer asked “Why did you spend so much time searching for this color Volvo? Why did it have to be this turquoise color?”

Jim smiled and said, as he drove off… “Well, there’s something about an aqua Volvo, man”

« Previous post
Next post »

Leave a Reply