Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Texas Critters

Category: Rated G

By Alan B. Combs


By now, some of you have heard me carry on about Texas varmints and critters — the mosquitos at Matagorda Island that will haul your butt away, the exceedingly large water roaches that can fly at you when molested or not, and the wretched, body-big-as-your-thumb centipedes with the orange heads (URL provided upon request). However, not all of our bugs are so remarkable. In fact, there are certain beetles that come out in the Spring that are not interesting at all. They are so boring that just talking about them puts people to sleep. The only characteristic that stands out is that they can stick in your hair. I am talking about our Texas jejune bugs, of course.

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