All posts tagged Tiff Wimberly

Scream of Wheat

A new groaner by Tiff Wimberly. Posted on PUNY. Yea!


Two farmers were talking at the co-op about the weather and crops, when a third farmer walks up and offers his two cents about the need for rain and yields and then ended his conversation by pulling out a handful of wheat berries from the pocket of his overalls and pelting the other two farmers with them before walking away.

One of the farmers said. “What in tarnation did he … Read the rest...

Heroes To The Occasion

Tiff Wimberly tells us this (mostly, I think) true tale.


You all probably didn’t know this but I have given birth to at least two superheroes.

I realized that my daughter was a superhero when she was a wee toddler babe and it was only after bathtime that her special powers would surface. She would run around naked with a hooded towel on her head. The “Queen of Clean”…a grime fighter! Able to run rings around a tub.

One half … Read the rest...

Starring Auntie Em as the Good Witch, Glinda

This was a recent pun cascade on the PUNY listserv.


It can be very difficult, when asked to write a story or a play, to not base any characters on people you already know. When you are a teenager, more often than not this means that your family members play some part in the part in your play, whether you intend them to or not.

This was just the case for Dorothy. Her drama class had written plays the year … Read the rest...

The Mole

Another gentle tale from punmaster Tiffany Wimberly.


A baby mole lost track of his mother in the underground tunnel that she was making. The little mole burrowed upward and ended up in a nest of young skunks who were waiting for their mother to return.

The young skunks took a liking to the vision-impaired burrower especially one of the females. Upon the mother skunk’s return, the young female skunk asked if they could adopt the lost mole into their family.… Read the rest...

Cliff Notes, Anyone?

The endlessly inventive Tiff Wimberly posted this timely note on PUNY.


A document that is 11,807 pages long has been delivered to the UN containing information regarding the Iraqi weapons of mass destruction program or lack thereof. Surely, our president who is contemplating war will receive some sort of condensed report of this document so he can decide what to do next. He will probably get the Leader’s Digest version.… Read the rest...

Hannibal

This message is by Tiff Wimberly who is always a fearsome contestant in the annual O. Henry Punoff World Championship competition.


Will someone please do me a FAVA and exSPLEEN to me what is America’s fascination with the movie “Hannibal”? What is so interesting about cannibalism? I certainly DONNER the answer to that question. The movie, Hannibal, was LUNCHed with much success at the box office in it’s first week.

I think the plots to all movies about cannibalism are … Read the rest...

How About a Cold One?

The following was a recent pun cascade posted on PUNY.


Well, since my “Mulligan Man” pun didn’t hook any fish, here’s another go:

What do you call an Eskimo prostitute?

Nanookie of the north!

CV

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I’d call it “The World’s Coldest Profession” :)

amino-x

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Does that make her a Frostitute?

CV

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Or a lady of the six-month night?

Joseph

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When she’s hot she’s hot, and when she’s cold……she’s still hot.

I heard that the Eskimo prostitute … Read the rest...

Cipro Inevitable

This timely tale is by Tiff Wimberly of Arkansas who frequently comes to Austin and kicks our butts in the World Punoff Championships.


I just got a junk email (junky mail) from an email address in India wanting to sell me Cipro, the antibiotic of choice to fight off our latest bio-terror scare. It was an inevitable that they would start capitalizing on this scare by sending emails to hawk their wares…definitely a case of spamthrax.… Read the rest...