Posts about businesses or specific occupations.
March 28, 2023 Pun of the Day
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/march-28-2023-pun-of-the-day/
March 22, 2023 Pun of the Day
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/march-22-2023-pun-of-the-day/
March 9, 2023 Pun of the Day
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/march-9-2023-pun-of-the-day/
February 27, 2023 Pun of the Day
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/february-27-2023-pun-of-the-day/
February 23, 2023 Pun of the Day
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/february-23-2023-pun-of-the-day/
February 14, 2023 Pun of the Day
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/february-14-2023-pun-of-the-day/
December 18, 2022 Pun of the Day
… http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/december-18-2022-pun-of-the-day/
The Kadinka-Donka Machine
This shaggy story was submitted by Wesley Parish, who says:
“Here’s something you might not have; it was a favourite at Yarralumla Primary in Canberra in the mid-70s.”
There was a rich and not altogether intelligent young man getting bored with his life of excessive privilege. One day while driving at random through the Peruvian Andes, he noticed a sign by the side of the road. It said “Kadinka-Donka Machines Our Speciality”.
So he went along the little side road … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/kadinka-donka-machine/
A Pun I Truly Relish
Denny Adams submitted this quick pun.
I went to the grocery store last night, and got to the cashier. She asked, “Paper or plastic?”
I said, “Either is fine. I’m Bi-sacktual.”… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/pun-truly-relish/
The Best Little Warehouse in Texas
This little gem was submitted by Denny Adams.
Did you hear about the illiterate hooker, who tried to get a job in a warehouse?… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/the-best-little-warehouse-in-texas/
Punslingers Round Two (Video)
Here’s the second round of Punslingers from last weekend’s O. Henry Pun-Off. It’s a mere 41 minutes in length.
Topics included:
– Handwriting Instruments
– Desserts, no Candy
– Exercise
– Magic & Illusions
– Currency & Coins
– Power Tools
– Fruits & Vegetables
– Archeology… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/punslingers-round-two-video/
Punslingers Round One (Video)
Here’s the first round of Punslingers from last weekend’s O. Henry Pun-Off. Grab some popcorn, because it runs for almost seventy minutes of puns!
Topics included:
– Space Travel
– Toys
– Candy, no Desserts
– Metal
– Photography
– Disney
– World War II
– Bread
– Mythology
– Headwear
– Chemistry
– Flowers
– Geology
– Hair, no Products
– Glassware
– Olympics… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/punslingers-round-one-video/
Don’t Let Adobe’s Lawyers See This!
… http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/dont-let-adobes-lawyers-see-this/
Brothel Sues Church (Adult Content)
Stan Kegel recently posted this to the Puns at Yahoo group. I do think it is an older tale, one that speaks too well to our human condition.
Diamond D’s brothel began construction on an expansion of their building to increase their ever-growing business. In response, the local Baptist Church started a campaign to block the business from expanding with morning, afternoon, and evening prayer sessions at their church.
Work on Diamond D’s progressed right up until the week before … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/brothel-sues-church-adult-content/
If I only had a Brain…
… http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/if-i-only-had-a-brain/
The Coke Salesman in Israel
Dave Wallace sent this in. He says he got it from a friend whose first husband was Jewish. Beyond that, it’s origin is unknown.
A disappointed salesman of Coca-Cola returned from his assignment to Israel.
A friend asked, “Why weren’t you successful with the Israelis?”
The salesman explained, “When I got posted, I was very confident I would make a good sales pitch. But I had a problem. I didn’t know how to speak Hebrew. So I planned to convey … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/the-coke-salesman-in-israel/
New Quickies
Here’s a new list of short ones making the rounds. Thanks to Don Drinnon.
I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic. Yep – it’s syncing now.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. BUT, He says he can stop any time.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
This … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/14245/
Shaggy Dog Gone
… http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/shaggy-dog-gone/
New Office Slang
This was posted at the pun page at yahoogrooups.com. If anyone has useful additions, let me know and I will post them.
404: Someone who is clueless. From the Web error message, “404 Not Found,” which means the document requested couldn’t be located. “Don’t bother asking John. He’s 404.”
Adminisphere: The rarified organizational layers above the rank and file that makes decisions that are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant.
Alpha Geek: The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/new-office-slang/
Memo to Customer Service
From Kirk Miller and posted to shaggydog@yahoogroups.com.
MEMO TO CUSTOMER SERVICE
This proves two things: 1) you’re not the only one who gets crappy service from your ISP, and 2) the Brits get better educations than most Americans, enabling them to write damned fine letters of complaint.
(NTL is a cable operator in Britain.)
Dear Cretins,
I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for your 3-in-one deal for cable TV, cable modem, and … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/memo-to-customer-service/
Something in My Stocking
This came to me while I was waiting for her to do her shopping. By Alan B. Combs
My wife went shopping for Christmas at one of our local chain department stores. I can’t say I’ve really been a good boy. I can’t even say I’ve tried very hard. Thus, I am pretty much assured of getting Kohl’s in my stocking.… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/something-in-my-stocking/
The New Job
This was posted by Stan Kegel on puns@yahoogroups.com.
A man walked into a temporary agency looking for some work.
“Here, fill these forms out and bring them back to me when you’re done,” the office administrator said.
The man finished the forms and brought them back to the administrator. “Very good,” she said as she looked them over. “We actually have a job for you,” she added. “It just came in. It’s at the library.”
“Great,” the man said. “When … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/the-new-job/
If Airlines Sold Paint
This story is at least ten years old. What it doesn’t have are the TSA grabbings and pat downs.
Customer: Hi. How much is your paint?
Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot of things.
Customer: Can you give me a guess? Is there an average price?
Clerk: Our lowest price is $12 a gallon, and we have 60 different
prices up to $200 a gallon.
Customer: What’s the difference in the paint?
Clerk: Oh, there isn’t … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/if-airlines-sold-paint-2/
Snow White
This was posted by Stan Kegel on the groaners listserv. It sticks in my mind that I had a version of this one, but I cannot find any documentation of such.
Snow White received a camera as a gift. She joyfully took many pictures of the Dwarves, the forest, the animals, etc. She quickly finished her first roll, and immediately took the film into town to be developed.
“How long before they’re ready?” Snow asked the clerk.
He informed her … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/snow-white/
Begging for a Chance
This tale is by Ted Brett.
Perhaps one of the most common jobs for young people as they work their way through college or try to pick up some extra money while still in high school is to work at local supermarkets. Most start out as baggers at the check-out counters, but occasionally promotions and opportunities come along and the chance for a little more money becomes important.
One young man had worked bagging groceries for a year but never … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/begging-for-a-chance/