This excellent and seasonal tale is by Jason Dias. It was posted to the PUNY listserv.

Ex-presidential candidate Bob Dole was at the Renaissance festival, when he saw a vendor selling very cute period tents. They were both charming and historically accurate. Ignoring the prominent `sold’ sign, he promised the vendor twice the original sale price for them.

“Sorry,” said the vendor. “I’ve already sold them to those teenagers over there. The ones dressed all in black with the scary pale make-up.”

“Triple, then,” offered Bob.

The vendor stood his ground, and Bob Dole made quite a nuisance of himself, until the vendor lost his temper and snapped:

“Shoo, Dole. The quaint tents be for Goths.”