by Alan B. Combs

Too frequently it’s just very difficult being a serpent. Fat ladies wham you with clubs, some people give you respect but very few give you love. This is the sad tale of a serpent we shall call Fred.

Fred needed love and appreciation, but being what he was, he found these hard to find. One day he tried to befriend a man in the park. Very soon, Fred figured out that the man did not have many admirable characteristics, if any. He was boorish, noisy, stupid, and gross with no hint of delicacy.

Fred tried to move away from this man, but it was too late. The man grabbed him up and ate him.

Now is the time to take off your hats and to shed tears for Fred. That poor creature only wanted love and affection, but he ended his life as a snake in the crass.

As frequently happens, Chris Cole has a topper for the story:

Sounds like, for the snake, that whole scenario was a real pain in the asp!