This shaggy tale came to me from Charlotte Herzele. The author is unknown.

Three old men are discussing their sex lives.

The Italian gentleman says, “Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil, we made passionate love, and she screamed for 5 minutes at the end.”

The Frenchman boasts, “Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for 15 minutes.”

The old Jewish man says, “Well, last week my wife and I had sex too. I rubbed her body all over with chicken schmaltz, we made love, and she screamed for 6 hours.”

The Italian and Frenchman were stunned. They replied, “What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for 6 hours?”

“I wiped my hands on the drapes.”

Lowrie Beacham says that if I keep telling these, it’s curtains for me.