Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Preserving the Fruit

Category: Rated G

Himie Koshevoy has this fruitful effort in his “Treasure Jest of Best Puns.”


May and her mother lived in California’s bountiful Santa Clara Valley where they spent all their time preserving the luscious fruit of that abundant place. They canned and jarred whole fruit, jams, preserves and jellies as each fruit was in season and they were famous for their quality product. Deciding to try something new they bought a carload of kumquats and began the preparations for boiling and sugaring and all the rest. Finally mother had everything all set and she called to her daughter to tell her her part of the work could begin: “Kumquat, May, we’re ready!”

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