Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Partly Patriotic

Category: Rated G

The Annual Bulwer-Lytton (http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/) writing contest is based upon the much stolen beginning line by Snoopy, “It was a dark and stormy night…” The contest is run each year by the Department of English at San Jose State University. The award is given to the worst lead-in to a dreadful story. Glenn Wasson earned a Dishonorable Mention for 2001 with this tale.


Dr Doolittle’s visage darkened as he dissected the diseased duodenum of the deceased male sheep, declaring that the malady was critically contagious and that it was our patriotic duty to guard the severed specimens from possible biological terrorists, so all through the night o’er the ram parts we watched.

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