Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


New Dictionary

Category: Pun Cascade, Puns@yahoogroups.com, Rated PG

A pun-cascade from several of the usual suspects at P.U.N.Y.


Amazon.com currently is advertising their new students’ dictionary
full of erroneous information: Flunk and Wagnalls.

Alan


There’s a new word compendium aimed directly at the homeless
community. It’s called the “Under-a-bridge Dictionary.”

Gary


I’ve always enjoyed thumbing through specialized dictionaries, but it bugs
me that I can’t find one on entomology.

What famous dictionary publishing house is patronized by NBA players?

Longman

Charles


A woman who wants to avoid a man’s advances can find the right words to turn
him down with in the dick-shun-ary.

Cynthia


A dictionary for the hearing impaired has deafinitions.

Alex


Does a dictionary with verbiage about songs vocalized without words offer
humonyms?

Cyn


I know a man who decided to write a song using all of the words in the
dictionary.
It began something like–It takes a wordy man to sing a wordy song.

Bert


I am not wordy of the honor (or offer) you are bestowing on me tonight.

Cyn


Would the opposite of “uncle” be its auntonym?

Charles

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