Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Never Underestimate Your Mother

Category: Rated PG-13, Shaggy Puppy

This was sent to me by my former student, Harry Hazelwood, III. The author is unknown.


Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, Brian’s mother couldn’t help but keep noticing how beautiful was Brian’s roommate, Stephanie. Mrs. Hester had long been suspicious of a relationship between Brian and his roommate, and this had only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, Mrs. Hester started to wonder even more if there was more than met the eye between Brian and his roommate.

Reading his Mom’s thoughts, Brian volunteered, “I know what you must be thinking, Mom, but I assure you Stephanie and I are just roommates.”

About a week later, Stephanie came to Brian saying, “Ever since your Mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don’t suppose she took it, do you?”

Brian said, “Well, I doubt it, but I’ll send her an e-mail just to be sure.” So he sat down and wrote: “Dear Mother, I’m not saying that you ‘did’ take the gravy ladle from the house, I’m not saying that you ‘did not’ take the ladle. But, the fact remains it’s been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love, your Son.”

Several days later, Brian received a letter from his Mother that read: “Dear Son, I’m not saying that you ‘do’ sleep with Stephanie, and I’m not saying that you ‘do not’ sleep with Stephanie. But, the fact remains that if she were sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now.
Love, Mom.”

LESSON OF THE DAY…………NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER.

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