Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Nativity Firemen

Category: Rated G

Colleague Shawn Bratton sent this timely tale. “Alan, I thought you might like this one. It has a pseudo-shaggy dog feel to it.” The author is unknown, but must be a Yankee transplant like so many of us.


In a small southern town there was a nativity scene that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. One small feature bothered me, the three wise men were wearing fireman’s helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left.

At a convenience store on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me. “You Yankees never do read The Bible!”

I assured her that I did, but simply couldn’t recall anything about firemen in The Bible.

She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face, she said, “See, it says right here, ‘The three wise men came from afar.'”

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