Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Murphy’s Lesser Known Dictums…

Category: Rated G

This was sent by Tom Vickery. These maxims explain a lot, at least for the cynics.


• Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

• He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

• Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.

• Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

• The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.

• The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.

• Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

• The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

• A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

• When you go into court, you are putting yourself In the hands of 12 people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Next post »

Leave a Reply