Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


May the Farce Be With You

Category: Rated G, Shaggy Puppy

Joe Black submitted the following sci fi shaggy puppy.


Luke Skywalker was trying to convince Master Yoda that he was ready to face the Dark Side, and was begging to be given a Final Test. The Small Green One thought for a moment and said “A trial which undergo you can, but perilous it is. Though not as powerful as the Sith Lords, there is a Corps of Officers of the Empire, who are not wise in the ways of the Force, but strong in technology they are, and black in the heart. Beware: They move not at all during combat, standing like a statue, while objects such as their personal communicator can freeze the blade of your weapon if mindful you are not of the Force. Defeat one of these silent assassins and another step you will have taken in your journey to becoming a Jedi Knight. Go, and come back wiser.”

In less than the rising and setting of two of the moons above, the Padawan returned, bearing as a trophy the charred remains of the communicator of his erstwhile foe.

Smiling softly the Jedi Master examined the device and turning to his apprentice, he whispered “Well you have done my young warrior. How to achieve this did you go?”

“Master,” replied Luke, “I followed your teaching and before combat was begun, I drew in the Force and searched it for the answer, and it came: Parry Hotter than the Still Officer’s Phone.”

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