Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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Maintenance Robot

Category: Gaggle of Groaners listserv, Puns, Rated G

From the groaners listserv.

Captain Jean-Luc Picard is sitting in his quarters, reading, when
he hears a knock. Upon opening the door, he sees Geordi LaForge,
who is carrying a small robotic device.

“This is your new maintenance robot, Captain.” says Geordi. “It’s
programmed to execute a variety of everyday chores.”

“Why! That sounds exceedingly useful!” exclaimed Picard. “Why,
only yesterday I was careless enough to rip the seam of my uniform
when I bent over to retrieve my phaser. Am I to presume that this
device might serve to reinstate the structural integrity about my

“Indeed, Captain. Would you like me to activate the robot’s
embroidery function?”

“Yes, Mr. LaForge.” said Jean-Luc. “Make it sew.”

Chris Caillout added:
One has to wonder: when Picard proposed to his girl, did he simply shout, “Engage!”?

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