Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Hockey Cheers

Category: Rated G

This is another original from Bob Dvorak.


It was a boring hockey game. Scoreless after one period. Scoreless after two periods. Up and down the ice, neutral-zone traps employed both directions, not even a decent fight to lend a touch of excitement to the game.

Fred dozed off. Judy, sitting next to him, wondered at how he could spend $115 per seat to take a nap. As the midway point of the third period approached, the hometown crowd began to take things into their own hands. They sang the name of the visiting goalie. They questioned the parentage of the referees. And, eventually, to dwell upon the oral habits of the visiting team.

Judy could take no more. With an elbow to the ribs, she awakened Fred. It was time to leave nodding to chants.

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