Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Fernando Llamas

Category: Rated G

This was sent to me by Jerry Kite. Thank you.


A long time ago in South America, when Llamas were first domesticated, their fine soft fleece was often combined with wool to make a fine soft cloth which was very valuable.

Well, something happened, and the Llamas started to run a high fever which damaged their fleece. Business men realized that something must be done very quickly. They tried to herd the Llamas to higher mountain areas where it would be cooler. This did not help, so they continued to move to the highest elevation possible. They began to notice some improvement and knew that if they could get the Llamas just a little bit higher and cooler, the problem would be solved, and they could again produce the valuable cloth.

They contracted with large construction companies to build very high masts and platforms that would support the Llamas and plenty of food. It was a resounding success. Their economy returned to normal. To advertise their success, they had to come up with a name for the location of their new business venture. After much thought and discussion, they finally decided on: “THE MAST OF THE RED HOT LLAMAS.”


This is an addendum to the Llama story from Anne The Unspammable’s cousin Ben.


Particularly noteworthy was a kind of boot whose uppers were made of this fine cloth, beautifully embroidered and beaded. These high-class, ritzy traditional boots of the Andes became famous worldwide as . . . wait for it. . . Tony Llamas.

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