Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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feghoots pa

Category: Original Feghoots, Poetry, Rated G

From the archives, a commentary on the Feghoot genera of tales by Dean Day.


feghoots pa said “boy…
life is but a lie, as it were…
it builds green trees to ease our eyes
and draws us under them.
then, while we are resting in the shade
and we breathe in to say
“ah, god, how beautiful”…
that’s when the bird on the branch
lets go his droppings
and hits us on the head.”

feghoot’s thoughts, upon release,
can only be inferred…
“oh, bird, I would that thou were good,
thou never wert deterred.”

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  1. dean day

     /  December 10, 2010

    the deep space probe to uranus
    was sterile,
    it was deemed without which
    our germs might infect’em.
    but some daft engineer
    touched the craft’s landing gear,
    and the teams that inspect’em
    all screamed out
    you wrecked’em.

  2. dean day

     /  December 31, 2010

    a tribe of north american indians, the yuckhoots, had a marvelous cosmogony. one of their myths went like this. the earth is supported on the back of a dog. This dog, naturally, is afflicted with fleas. when he scratches at them the earth trembles, giving rise to earthquakes. when this scratching fails to alleviate the itch, the dog goes on to gnaw at his hide, perforating the skin, wereupon blood emerges from the fissures, causing volcanoes. These musings were known amongst the indians to be the theory of canine dental rift.

  3. dean day

     /  December 31, 2010

    a tribe of north american indians, the yuckhoots, had a marvelous cosmogony. one of their myths went like this. the earth is supported on the back of a dog. This dog, naturally, is afflicted with fleas. when he scratches at them the earth trembles, giving rise to earthquakes. when this scratching fails to alleviate the itch, the dog goes on to gnaw at his hide, perforating the skin, whereupon blood emerges from the fissures, causing volcanoes. These musings were known amongst the indians to be the theory of canine dental rift.

  4. dean day

     /  February 2, 2011

    Bacteria in the Gut May Influence Brain Development
    ScienceDaily (Feb. 1, 2011) — A team of scientists from around the globe have found that gut bacteria may influence mammalian brain development and adult behavior. The study is published in the scientific journal PNAS, and is the result of an ongoing collaboration between scientists at Karolinska Institutet in Sweden and the Genome Institute of Singapore.
    ________________________________________
    The research team compared behavior and gene expression in two groups of mice — those raised with normal microorganisms, and those raised in the absence of microorganisms (or germ-free mice). The scientists observed that adult germ-free mice displayed different behavior from mice with normal microbiota, suggesting that gut bacteria may have a significant effect on the development of the brain in mammals.
    The adult germ-free mice were observed to be more active and engaged in more ‘risky’ behavior than mice raised with normal microorganisms. When germ-free mice were exposed to normal microorganisms very early in life, as adults they developed the behavioral characteristics of those exposed to microorganisms from birth. In contrast, colonizing adult germ-free mice with bacteria did not influence their behavior.
    Subsequent gene profiling in the brain identified genes and signaling pathways involved in learning, memory and motor control that were affected by the absence of gut bacteria, highlighting the profound changes in the mice that developed in the absence of microorganisms. This suggests that, over the course of evolution, colonization of the gut by microorganisms (in total 1.5 kilograms) in early infancy became integrated into early brain development.
    “The data suggests that there is a critical period early in life when gut microorganisms affect the brain and change the behavior in later life,” says Dr. Rochellys Diaz Heijtz, first author of the study.
    “Not only are signal substances like serotonin and dopamine subject to regulation by bacteria, synapse function also appears to be regulated by colonizing bacteria,” continues Prof. Sven Pettersson, coordinator of the study. “However, it is important to note that this new knowledge can be applied only to mice, and that it is too early to say anything about the effect of gut bacteria on the human brain.”
    Madoff claimed to investigators that he traded by using his “gut feelings.” SEC investigators didn’t pursue the inquiry any further.

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