Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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Feghoot Woody

Category: Original Feghoots, Rated G

By Alan B. Combs — based on a character created by Reginald Bretnor.


Ferdinand Feghoot visited the planet Sycamore y Robles during the end of the breeding season of the year 3725. The many high mountains were in flower and they were particularly beautiful that season. The termite-like inhabitants were large by Terran standards, the queens sometimes encompassing the length and breadth of a 21st Century American soccer field.

After traditional nuptials culminated by eating of the drained drones, the queens would scatter out into the countryside for their gestation. After the hatching, it was the habit of the many young to crawl into many of the female body cavities for post-hatch nursing. This event was frequently imperceptible to the queen because of the relatively small size of her progeny.

It would otherwise be unseemly to go into these intimate details of our Roblean allies, but to do so is necessary to explain the great service Feghoot did for the clan of Queen Madera. Queen Madera spent her royal gestation and post-hatching time upon the very highest of the Roblean mountains. However, when she came home, her brood could not be found. All of the usual orifices were checked and a sense of impending doom came upon the Clan Madera. A lost generation would be a disaster.

As usual, Ferdinand Feghoot saved the day. He suggested that they search Queen Madera’s nasal cavities and, therein, the missing larvae were found. When asked how he knew to make such a fortuitous suggestion, Feghoot replied that he remembered an old medical warning — that high altitudes are frequently conducive to nose breeds.

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