Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

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Evil Eric Shun

Category: Gaggle of Groaners listserv, Rated G

This came from Jim McMaster , and was posted via the Groaners listserv by Stan Kegel.


There was once an evil scientist named Eric Strano. He hated all of humanity. He was so mean he moved to the wilds of Transylvania and erected signs all around his property saying, “EVIL SCIENTIST! KEEP OUT!”

Strano hated mankind so much he decided to do away with everyone on Earth. His fiendish plan was to develop an army of man-eating robots that would devour everyone on Earth. His first model, the Alpha, was not successful. It could take only a small bite, then spit it out.

Strano was not discouraged. The Beta model was a bit better, and each model after that was better still. Finally, Strano built the Kappa model, which could devour an entire human in one fell chomp.

Strano build an army of Kappas, and released them. They fanned out across Europe, eating every human in sight. Then they migrated to Africa, Asia and the Americas, still gobbling up every single person.

Finally, the Kappas had eaten every human on Earth but one, but they still were not satisfied. Soon Strano heard a loud clanking in the Transylvanian forest. Everywhere he turned, there was a robot bearing down upon him.

It seems the Kappas had returned to swallow Strano.

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