Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Elvis, Take Two

Category: Puns, Rated PG-13

By Alan B. Combs


Getting started in Show Biz is always difficult. There are so many excellent aspirants and so few gigs that actually pay a living wage. It was no different with Elvis at the beginning of his career. Consequently, while he was in the process of being discovered, he was obliged to keep his Daye job. (It’s a temptation to say he was her chauffeur, but that’s a different story.)

One of Elvis’s early jobs was working in a sheep-neutering plant. Day in and out, he would help to relieve the poor animals of what we human males might consider to be one, excuse me, a pair of nature’s greatest blessings. The poor sheep just weathered their sacrifice.

Finally, Elvis achieved his first hit and his first recording contract. Immediately, he quit this job, leaving his coworkers to explain, “Ladies and Gentlemen, Elvis has left the gelding.”

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