Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Dixie

Category: Rated G

This was sent to me by Bev McGuire. It was posted on Adrian Gilbert’s jokelist.


A bill collector knocked on the door of a country debtor. “Is Fred home?” he asked the woman who answered the door. “Sorry,” the woman replied. “Fred’s gone for cotton.”

The next day the collector tried again. “Is Fred here today?” “No, sir,” she said, “I’m afraid Fred has gone for cotton.”

When he returned the third day he humphed, “I suppose Fred is gone for cotton again,?” “No,” the woman answered solemnly, “Fred died yesterday.”

Suspicious that he was being avoided, the collector decided to wait a week and investigate the cemetery himself. But sure enough, there was poor Fred’s tombstone, with this inscription: … “Gone, But Not for Cotton.”

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