Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Camp Lecturers

Category: Rated G

This is by Phil Hudson.


When the summer holidays came, the lecturers at the Open University had the chance to go on a camping and sightseeing trip across the UK. However, this meant that the participants would not get paid during the duration of the holiday, and only a couple of lecturers ended up going on the trip.

The trip itself was very extensive – from Lands End to John O’ Groates, with plans to see many famous sites, including statues, cathedrals, bridges, castles, towers, monuments and many more! It took the complete summer break to finish the trip.

Just before the university started again in early September, a report was written regarding all members of staff and their activities during the summer. This was to determine their summer pay. Of course, everyone who didn’t go on the trip worked very hard in teaching the summer part-time activity classes.

It was not a surprise to find them all angry when they realised that the pair of lecturers who went camping were paid more than everyone else, despite the rules. When they queried the report, the last line read: –

“Mr. Brown and Miss. Smith – two touring the entire country. A landmark scheme!”

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