By Phil Hudson

A friend of mine (who is very indecisive) offered to take care of the garden while I went on holiday. He’s no professional green-fingers, but the price was right.

Anyhow, when I returned home, I noticed that the two rows of shrubbery that used to run around the perimeter of the garden were blatantly sliced down. I was very angry at the action taken, so I went up to my ‘friend’ and demanded an explaination.

The only reply he gave me was “the situation was a double-hedge sawed”.