Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


Aesop’s Poodle

Category: Rated G

By Bob Dvorak


Jeffrey the Turtle loved to read. By far and away, as you can imagine, his favorite story was Aesop’s Fable — The Tortoise and the Hare. He dreamed of his own day, when he might win a similar race.

One day he chanced upon a rabbit, and, seizing the day, challenged it to a race. Having nothing better to do, the rabbit agreed. They set a course through the wheat field and arranged for a friendly squirrel to referee the event.

The rabbit, of course, had never heard of Aesop. In due course, it got halfway across the field and sat down to wait for our hero.

Some time thereafter Jeffrey came plodding along. As the rabbit stood up to taunt him, the farmer came along with the wheat thresher and turned the pair of them into gore. This unfortunate accident was reported in the community as “Jeff and a Hare Cut to Bits.

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