An original by Gary Hallock, PUNY’s punmeister.

A fellow who suffered from Hansen’s disease had two pet dogs, both named “Spot.” He recently moved into town from a rural area where Spot 1 and Spot 2 had been accustomed to roaming the countryside freely and generally doing things doggie style. His pets had a bit of trouble adapting to city life. They were forever digging under the back yard fence, roaming the neighborhood looking for heated bitches. After several such incidents, the guy was informed that he would have to restrain his pets.

“You’ll just have to tie them up,” the animal control officer insisted.

“But these are country dogs, they’re used to shagging.” he protested. “A leper can’t just chain his Spots.”