Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


A Look Back Into High School

Category: Rated PG

Cousin Jo Ann sent this. She’s gotten the date wrong, however.


Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, surely I can’t look that old. Well. you’ll love this one.

My name is Alice Smith and I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his DDS diploma, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 30-odd years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on, way back then?

Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate.

After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Oakdale High School .

“Yes. Yes, I did. I’m a Mustang,” he gleamed with pride.

“When did you graduate?” I asked.

He answered, “In 1967. Why do you ask?”

“You were in my class!”, I exclaimed.

He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, bald, wrinkled, fat ass, gray haired, decrepit son-of-a-bitch asked, “What did you teach?”

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