Tarzan's Tripes Forever, and Other Feghoots

The Web's Original Shaggy Dog Story Archive


A Common Trigonometric Principle

Category: Rated G

There are several versions of this tale. This one is by Bryce L. Martin.


Once there was an Indian chief who divorced his squaw, to marry a younger woman. Some time after this occurred, he was out on a hunting party with some of his braves. They came upon a hippopotamus which had escaped from a travelling circus show. The chief shot it, and took the hide home to his new bride to use for a bedspread.

His two sons by his former marriage became all upset and jealous at this because all their mother had for her bedspread were a couple of very ordinary cowhides. Day by day their jealousy grew, until finally they challenged their new stepmother to a duel. They stepped out to the edge of the reservation at sunrise, and fought tooth and nail all day long. At sunset nobody had budged an inch! So they had to declare it an even draw.

What this serves to demonstrate is:

That the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaw of the two hides!!


Miss Scarlett added

Please. That’s an oldie, but goodie. It’s a sine of our times, just cos it’s writtan differently, doesn’t mean it’s not the same thang.

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