Himie Koshevoy has a version of this story in his “Treasure Jest of Best Puns.”
When Alexander The Great was waging war on the entire known world of his time, it chanced that he received a slight spear-wound on his wrist. Wrapping an old cloth around it, he continued the battle. After victory was his, one of his aides noticed that the dried blood on the rag around Alexander The Great’s wrist was lining up on it in such a … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/alexander-tg/
This is by Alan B. Combs.
“Wry whimsy, wry whimsy,
Wry whimsy,” I cry.
“If I don’t get wry whimsy,
I surely will die.”… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/variations-heard-on-a-country-folk-song/
An older version of the same story is given in “Himie Koshevoy’s Treasure Jest of Best Puns”, 1969.
Here is a story about the Frugal Gourmet’s recent visit to Europe last summer. He had a delightful time sampling the cusine in Italy, France and Germany , but he made the mistake of stopping off in London on the way home. Needless to say, he found English food bland and overcooked. However, one day he had a great meal of fish … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/the-frugal-gourmet/
Farmer Jones had heard that the best milk comes from contented cows. Therefore, he’d visit them every morning and tell them jokes. The cows laughed and laughed, and they gave excellent milk. However, the news got around and no one else was much amused. Thus, his cows became the laughing stock of the community.… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/contented-cows/
I can remember this excellent pun from my callow yoot. No one ever seemed to get the punchline. This version appears in Himie Koshevoy’s “Treasure Jest of Best Puns.
Mamie Webser, widowed early in her marriage, carried on working her husband’s cattle ranch and for many years toiled at the arduous chores that go with raising beef for market. As the years wore on, her three big sons took on more and more of the work until she was able … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/the-ranchers-will/
This was taken from Bama Brown, a local DJ. I don’t know from where he got it.
The Federal Government is now planning to provide extremely low cost housing for those vertically challenged members of our society.
These domiciles will be known as the Stay Free minipads.… Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/what-will-the-govt-do-next/
In medieval times there was a court jester whose wont was always to come up with the most atrocious puns. This continued for months on end, whereupon the king lost his patience and sentenced the jester to be hanged.
The poor wretch was standing on the gallows with a rope around his neck when a messenger came riding posthaste from the castle, exclaiming, “Wait! The king has decided to spare the jester’s life, provided that he never again tell another … Read the rest...
http://shaggy-dogs.briancombs.net/fitting-punishment/